43: Comanche

This place wasn't always a diner, it was built for something narrow and urgent. The joint is full of moes trying to smother tonight's drunk under eggs and grits and flesh and fat.
There's only one waitress and she is custom built. Pushing fifty with a face that's still waiting for pretty. Straight back, bony hands, calves like a goatfucker. A name tag that reads "Daisy". No shit.
She hasn't stopped moving. Not in an hour and a half. Maybe more. She jerks along efficiently up and down that corridor with the lunging lushes. The floor is coated with grease and spit. Plates piled high with oozing, sliding sick make it from window to table without loosing a molecule. She's good.
There must be miles beneath her soles already, with miles still to come. This table, then the next, then the next, then the next, then the next, then the counter, the whole lenght of it. Endlessly. The show's a bit too ungainly to be mesmerizing. Fascinating though . An hour and a half already. At least.

"Ready to go yet?" asks Kadrey.
"No," says Evan, "not until something breaks."

1 comment:

Heather said...

It seems like the photograph is both in opposition and a representation of the narrative. I get a sense of a routine or a maze, very regular, from the narrative, with the waitress and the tables. The customers are the stationary obstacles, the mess and irregularity. The photo has us trapped in the same way, we can only see the shadows and not the actual trees. Our vision is limited, like I want to be able to see the structure that makes the pattern, the "maze" of branches. So it is chaotic like the narrative, but also very different in that it is of nature. There are no people and the messy branches seem acceptable and natural. At first I wondered why you paired these two, but the more I think about it, the more I like it. Your characters seem like watchers, not much happens to them, but a lot happens around them. This is ideal, I think, for showing what they see, rather than they themselves, which can in turn flesh them out. I want more photographs, more of what they are seeing.